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Word Nerd: How many of these world-famous fake languages do you know?

24 Jul

Many of us have, at some point in our childhood, conversed in a language that is fake, or perhaps made up a “secret” code with our friends. Here are a few fake languages that people around the world share, thanks to pop culture, books, and movies.

Pig Latin: This is a “secret” language kids sometimes use for fun. It is based on English, and the words are formed by transferring the initial consonant of a word to the end of the word and adding -ay. So the Pig Latin word for Pig Latin is Igpay Atinlay. Its predecessor is Dog Latin, which is simply a parody of Latin. Even Shakespeare wasn’t above Dog Latin. In our time, perhaps no one has done more to promote this Latine de Canibus than Harry Potter creator J.K. Rowling, who has given us spells such as “Expelliarmus” and “Quietus”.

Elvish: Lord of the Rings nerds will be quick to point out that this is not one language, but at least two. British author J.R.R. Tolkien, who wrote the Hobbit books in the 1930s and 1940s, created not just whole languages but the entire fictional civilization known as Middle Earth. Before he became a fantasy novelist, he was a student of languages, and he had developed the Elvish language before he even wrote The Hobbit. Quenya, or High Elvish, is based on the Finnish language, and Sindarin (Low Elvish) is based on Welsh.

Nadsat: In his 1962 novel A Clockwork Orange, British author Anthony Burgess created an argot for the protagonist Alex his friends. The teenage boys use slang that is based on Russian. So for example, “friends” are “droogs”, and when you see something, you “viddy” it. In fact, –nadsat is a Russian suffix roughly equivalent to -teen in English (e.g. thirteen in Russian is trinadsat, fifteen is pyatnadsat, and so on).

Klingon: Originally created for the brutal and exploitative extraterrestrial species, also known as Klingons, in the Star Trek TV series (1960s) and films, this language has taken on a life of its own. Its creator, American linguist Marc Okrand, has published three books on the subject. Many important works of English literature have been translated into Klingon. Today it’s possible to learn the fictional alien language from Klingon Language Institute or Duolingo. There’s even an opera in Klingon, although, due to the lack of actual Klingon actors, the performers are usually human.

Dothraki: This one is familiar to Game of Thrones fans. It is the language spoken by the warlike Dothraki nomads who inhabit the grasslands of Essos. When he first started work on The Song of Ice and Fire (the book series on which Game of Thrones is based), American author George R. R. Martin, had no elaborate plans for the language. But when HBO decided to make the TV show, they had Martin’s snippets converted into a full-fledged language.

All fake languages are not equal. John McWhorter, Associate Professor of English and Comparative Literature at Columbia University, argues that “constructed languages” such as Dothraki are much more than “codes like Pig Latin, or “fabricated slang” like Nadsat. “It helps, of course, to have a lot of words. Dothraki has thousands of words,” he says. But, he adds, it takes more than words to make a language. “After all, you could memorize 5,000 words of Russian and still be barely able to construct a sentence. A four-year-old would be able to talk rings around you. That’s because you have to know how to put the words together, that is, a real language has grammar. Elvish does.” Real languages also change over time and space, and Tolkien ensured that this “happened” to Elvish as well.

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By Uma Asher

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Word Nerd: Why is spam called spam?

17 Jul

At every stage of civilization, human beings have battled different scourges ranging from the plague to dandruff. One of the scourges of our digital age is spam.

The word generally refers to intrusive advertising on the internet. If you have email and a mobile phone, you have probably received such messages from strangers urging you to buy anything, from fuzzy socks to real estate. But have you ever wondered why it’s called spam?

The reason can be traced back to the 1930s, when a US company called Hormel Foods launched a brand of canned meat called Spam. In 2007, the seven billionth can of Spam was sold.

The origin of the brand name remains unclear, but it has led to amusing speculation. According to one theory, the name was a contraction of “spiced ham”. Another theory was that Spam was an acronym for “Specially Processed American Meat” or “Specially Processed Army Meat” (World War II began soon after the brand was launched, and the cans became a staple in the diet of US troops, as it was difficult to get fresh meat at the warfront). Then came the jokes about Spam being “ham that didn’t pass its physical” and “meatloaf without basic training”.

Cut to 1970. The British surreal comedy troupe Monty Python aired their now-classic sketch titled “Spam”, in which two customers descend into a café that appears to be a Viking hangout, and are confronted with a menu irritatingly riddled with Spam.

The internet meaning of spam appears to be derived from this sketch. In the early days of the internet, marketers inundated Usenet newsgroups and individual email accounts with advertising messages. This phenomenon came to be called ‘spamming’, an allusion to the repetitive and unwanted recurrence of Spam in the sketch.

This phenomenon has even been reported in court decisions following lawsuits against spammers from the 1990s on. The term has also entered the world of video gaming, where it refers to the production of a large quantity of something (for example, rocket-spamming, grenade-spamming).

Understandably, Hormel Foods hasn’t been thrilled about all this, but it’s been a good sport, even releasing a special can to celebrate the Broadway premiere of the musical Spamalot, based on a Monty Python film.

The Python programming language, named after Monty Python, replaced the traditional words “foo”, “bar” and “baz” (used as metasyntactic variables, or placeholder words used in programming) with “spam”, “ham” and “eggs”.

Got any more Spam trivia to share? Leave a comment below!

Word Nerd: 5 weird words heard at Wimbledon

10 Jul

It’s Wimbledon season, and tennis fans can’t stop talking about it, while their cricket- and football-loving friends keep trying to change the subject. Have you ever wondered about how strange the vocabulary of tennis is? Here are a few terms – feel free to add more in the comments!

1. Racket

Selling match tickets illegally is one example of a racket. The noise made by shrieking sports fans is another. And a third example is, of course, the hitting device without which Roger Federer, Andy Murray, Angelique Kerber and the rest of them would score a bagel (see below). The origin of ‘racket’ is unclear. It may be imitative of clattering sounds. An alternative spelling is ‘racquet’, and probably originally referred to a tennis-like game played with the open hand.

2. Court

This where racketeers of all types end up (or ought to). But tennis players are nothing like lawyers, so why are both their stomping grounds called ‘courts’? Well, in medieval French, cort referred to a royal court or residence. The word came from the Latin cors, meaning ‘enclosed yard’. The earlier form of cors was cohors (com- means together, and hortus refers to a garden or plot of ground – and yes, the English word ‘cohort’ comes from the same root). By extension, cors also referred to those who assembled in the yard. The word first entered sports – via tennis – in the early 16th century.

3. Deuce

This word has its roots in late 15th-century gaming culture, as it referred to the two in dice and cards. It comes from Middle French deus (deux in Modern French), which is derived from the Latin duos, meaning ‘two’. By the early 18th century, it was being used as a mild curse referring to the devil, perhaps because two was the lowest score. In tennis, ‘deuce’ means a score of 40 all, with the game going to the first player to score two consecutive points.

4. Bagel

Ordinary mortals might make a meal of one, but to a tennis player it means much more than carbs. A bagel in tennis refers to a score of zero. In a 6-0 game, the loser is said to have handed the winner a ‘bagel’ (since the bread resembles a zero). A ‘breadstick’ refers to a 6-1 game. There even existed an annual Golden Bagel Award (2004-13), which went to the top-eight player who captured the most bagels. See the all-time bagel greats here.

5. Love

To normal human beings, this word is full of feels. It comes from the Old English lufu, which is of Germanic origin. Dig deeper and you will find it has an Indo-European root which is shared by Sanskrit (the Sanskrit verb lubhyati means ‘desires’). In Latin, libet means ‘it is pleasing’, and libido means ‘desire’. But to tennis players, as the old joke goes, love means nothing.

If you have any tennis terms to add to our list, leave a comment below!

Word Nerd: 8 weird definitions that you never thought belonged in a dictionary

3 Jul

Open any dictionary today – whether online or print, and look up a word. Even if you look at a word that’s funny, for instance a name you can call a person, the definition will be simple and precise. It’s easy to forget that these definitions have been written by real people with opinions and biases, and hard to believe, a sense of humour.

But dictionaries weren’t always like this. Lexicographers certainly weren’t. We’re talking about one in particular, titled ‘A Dictionary of the English Language.’ It was written by Dr. Samuel Johnson.

The dictionary was first published on 15 April 1755. It was an ambitious work with 42,733 entries. It was not the first English dictionary ever published but it was the most comprehensive one. And Dr. Johnson, with his sense of humour, monumental scholarship and staggering hard work shaped his unique achievement. This dictionary doesn’t just have more than 42,000 words, it also has more than 100,000 supporting quotations.

The definitions of these words are funny, personal and even politically incorrect. And quite a few of the words are obsolete. Nevertheless, in these words and definitions, we get a glimpse of one of a unique personality and of the 18th century. As word nerds, what more can we ask for? Enjoy.

1) Liplabor: Action of the lips without concurrence of the mind.

Not a word that exists anymore, but one that can be brought back, given how people behave on social media today.

2) Lexicographer: A writer of dictionaries; a harmless drudge, that busies himself in tracing the original, and detailing the signification of words.

Word nerds though we are, we quite understand. Everyone is allowed a little self-pity/self-mockery at some point. As is Dr. Johnson.

3) Mushroom: An upstart, a wretch risen from the dunghill.”
A definition that leaves us speechless. Perhaps Johnson needed to be introduced to pizza to enjoy mushrooms better? Or maybe Chinese cuisine. At any rate, that little fungus deserves better.

4) Oats: A grain, which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people.

Johnson wasn’t particularly fond of the Scots, as is obvious from this definition. But, some argue that he was just stating a fact here. Nevertheless, Oxford and other dictionaries are more clinical about the definition today. And less likely to upset people from Scotland.

5) Sock: Something put between the foot and the shoes.

Well, he’s not wrong there. But, it sounds like Dr. Johnson was just giving up at this point.

6) Shapesmith: One who undertakes to improve the form of the body.
In other words, a personal trainer. We prefer Johnson’s word, although we wonder just how many shapesmiths were gainfully employed in Dr. Johnson’s time.

7) Stateswoman: A woman who meddles with public affairs. In contempt.

Clearly a definition that would not pass muster today. Remember Dr. Johnson lived in an age where learning in women was appreciated only by a very few. The public sphere was not where they belonged unless they were society women or actresses.

The current Oxford definition gives us much relief.

8) Vaticide: A murderer of poets.

We don’t know why there was ever a need for this word. Were there way too many poets milling with, and annoying, the crowd? Or, were there too many psychopaths who took exception to rhyming and poetic metres? We can only wonder.

Thankfully, the word is not in current usage. We’d like to return to our slender volume of funny poems now please, thank you.

Here is a funny clip from BBC’s Blackadder series on Dr. Johnson and his dictionary.

Any other funny dictionary definitions you would like to share with us?
Email us or leave a comment below.

Word Nerd: 5 hilarious Hinglish habits and how to drop them

26 Jun

Speaking and using more than one language is a great gift for our brain. But, it comes with its own (conquerable) set of challenges! For one, learning the grammar and vocabulary of a second language often seems easier than acquiring its syntax and idioms. Secondly, progressing from a listener to a reader/ writer and a speaker takes work. And excelling in one linguistic function does not guarantee proficiency in others. Often, we might observe people write more fluently than they speak or vice versa.

In India, for example, many find it easy to write as an academic exercise. But when it comes to speaking, outdated idioms and a stiff style often trip us up. With over 125 million English speakers, it is no surprise that Indians have evolved their own version of the language – jokingly branded Hinglish.

Now, apart from humour, Hinglish serves precious few purposes. So here are 5 of the funniest examples of Hinglish, and how you can avoid them.

1. The pervasive progressive tense

“I was knowing this but I forgot” or “I am having two dogs, both rescued.”

Progressive tense shows an action still in progress – something that is happening now. Normally, the tense is linked to dynamic verbs, i.e; verbs which describe action – eat, run, sleep, read, write, etc.
So, it makes perfect sense to say, “I am running to the bus stop now.”

But, to associate continuous action with stative verbs is peculiar to Hinglish. Stative verbs (the clue’s in the name) describe states of being: love, hate, know, doubt, etc.

If you like pizza but prefer burgers, and you say, “I’m liking pizza but I’m preferring burgers” the Hinglish horn will blare loudly. So, yeah, avoid that.

2. The big-word problem

“Your pusillanimity will prevent your success.”

Indians often succumb to the notion that good English is dense English, filled with polysyllabic words of a Victorian vintage. This is not true.

Fluency in any language means being able to put the right words in the right place. A good vocabulary is obviously useful. But, it doesn’t mean plonking the longest Latinate construction just to show people you read.

Some of E.B. White’s rules simple rules for style are, “Avoid fancy words. Do not overwrite. Do not overstate.”

3. The misplaced modifier

“I was just about to tell you only” or “He was just going but!”

We love qualifying our statements like we were born to Doge. And while “the moon was so silver” and “the stars are very twinkly” can somehow pass muster, “I was about to go to her only” cannot.

This is a uniquely Indian twist on the language. And unless you are using it for comic effect like the late, great Nissim Ezekiel, we suggest you drop this habit like the hottest of potatoes.

4. The hanging sentence. . .

“I was going to come to your place last night but then. . . “

(Your car died? You fainted? The Prime Minister dropped in? You left for Tibet?)

We can’t expect our thoughts to transfer through osmosis. Unless we finish our sentences, it is unlikely that the other person will understand what we meant to say. Very few of us are psychics.

5. The unending sentence

“I sat up and ate my cereal but didn’t really like the taste of it; that’s when my mum told me she had checked the dates and it had expired. . . “Well, thanks,” I said, “Could’ve told me earlier because now we’re out of my favourite cereal.”

Yes, yes, we’ve got a lot to say. But, we don’t have to pack it all in one sentence. We have lots of sentences, paragraphs even, maybe a letter or an essay, to spell it all out. We’ve written more about the good sentence here.

To end with, we would like to share this wonderful poem by Nissim Ezekiel. It’s called, “Goodbye Party for Ms. Pushpa T.S.” Ezekiel’s speaker captures nearly all the sins of Hinglish. Go on, have a laugh. And then, never make these mistakes again.

Are there any hilarious examples of Hinglish that you would like to share with us?
Email us or leave a comment below.

Word Nerd: 5 made-up words that are now part of the English language

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Word Nerd: 6 easy tricks to pronounce Italian words correctly

19 Jun

American physicist Richard Feynman was a genius. Not only did he know a thing or two about science (he won the Nobel Prize in 1965), but as an adult he learned how to speak Japanese, play a Brazilian musical instrument, and how to paint (he even sold some art). One thing he did not know was Italian. But he told the story of how he faked it, just for laughs. When he was in college, he accompanied his younger sister to her Girl Scouts banquet (he was filling in for their dad). Suddenly it was announced that the dads were expected to entertain the crowd. Unfazed, Feynman declared that he would recite a poem, but unfortunately it was not in English. He then recited several verses – very emotionally – in fake Italian, and had the girl scouts in splits. Later a couple of teachers sought him out to settle their dispute as to whether his poem was in Latin or Italian. He replied, “You’ll have to go ask the girls – they understood what language it was right away.”

Well, you don’t need Feynman’s IQ to figure out the rules of Italian pronunciation. They are relatively few and highly consistent, making the language easy to pronounce. Once you’ve got the rules down, you will never fumble while ordering gnocchi ai funghi or looking for an Ermenegildo Zegna store.

1. Emphasis

In general, the emphasis is on the second-to-last syllable, e.g. mi-la-no (Milan), gab-ba-na (surname). There are a few exceptions, such as università (pronounced u-ni-ver-si-ta, not u-ni-ver-si-ta) and opera (op-era, not op-er-a). The best way to get a feel for the language is to listen to native speakers.

2. Vowels

Unlike English vowels, which can be pronounced in many ways (for example, go, got, gown), Italian ones are pronounced in pretty much the same way all the time. Here are the approximate British-English equivalents: ‘a’ as in ‘car’, ‘e’ as ‘get’, ‘i’ like the ‘y’ in ‘springy’, ‘o’ as in ‘go’, and ‘u’ like the ‘oo’ in ‘book’. As you can imagine, a vowel in a stressed syllable is a bit longer than in an unstressed syllable. An ‘e’ at the end of a word is not silent – Salvatore (man’s name) is sal-va-to-reh.

Store in Hong Kong (photo by istolethetv, used under CC license)

3. ‘C’ and ‘g’

It’s easier than it looks! The sound is hard when the letter is followed by ‘a’, ‘o’, or ‘u’, so ‘c’ is pronounced like ‘k’, and ‘g’ as in the English word ‘go’. Now you know how to pronounce casa (house), cosa (thing), and Guido (man’s name). Reminder: accent on the second-to-last syllable – ca-sa, co-sa, gu-i-do.

When followed by ‘e’ or ‘i’, the Italian ‘c’ is pronounced like ‘tch’ in the English ‘watch’, and the Italian ‘g’ is pronounced like ‘j’ in ‘Justin’. So now you can pronounce cera (wax), cucina (kitchen), and gelato (duh!).

One thing to remember is that if there’s another vowel after ‘gi’ or ‘ci’, you should pronounce only the second vowel! The ‘i’ only softens the sound of the ‘g’ or ‘c’. Thus, for example, Giovanni (man’s name) is ‘jo-van-ni’, not ‘ji-o-van-ni’. So now you know how to pronounce ‘Giorgio Armani’ (jor-jo ar-ma-ni), ciabatta (tcha-bat-ta, a kind of bread), and ciao (tcha-o, meaning hello).

When ‘g’ is followed by ‘n’, it sounds like ‘ny’ in ‘Tanya’. So bagno (bath) is pronounced ‘ba-nyo’, Bologna (name of a city) is bo-lo-nya, and lasagne (a type of flat, layered pasta) is la-za-nyeh.

‘Gli’ denotes a peculiarly Italian sound made by pressing the tip of your tongue just behind your front teeth. The ‘g’ is silent, but the ‘l’ is emphatic, and almost like a ‘y’. For example, taglia (ta-llya, meaning size).

Tagliatelle, a type of ribbon pasta (photo by Gonzalo Malpartida, used under CC license)

4. ‘Ch’ and ‘gh’

There’s no ‘k’ in Italian (‘j’, ‘k’, ‘w’, ‘x’ and ‘y’ are used mostly in foreign, i.e. non-Italian, words). The letter ‘c’ takes on a soft sound when followed by ‘i’ or ‘e’. So, to spell words with a ‘kay’ or ‘ki’ sound, Italians add an ‘h’. Very few Italian words use an ‘h’ by itself (and it’s usually silent, as in hai, meaning ‘you have’). More commonly, the job of the ‘h’ is to harden the ‘c’ or ‘g’. Thus you get chiaro (‘kia-ro’, light-colored) and funghi (foon-ghi, mushroom). Now you know how to say Chianti and Michelangelo: ki-an-ti, mi-kel-an-je-lo.

A store in Venice (photo by Dimitris Kamaras, used under CC license)

5. Double letters

Easy! Just pronounce them doubly. Most letters are pretty simple: Ferragamo (surname), doppio (double). Now we’re ready to tackle macchiato (a kind of strong black coffee). The ‘h’ tells you that’s a hard ‘c’, pronounced like a ‘k’. Two Cs are pronounced like 2 Ks. That’s right – it’s pronounced mak-kia-to.

What if there are two Cs or two Gs without an ‘h’ – as in the famous Gucci (surname) or the all-important formaggio (cheese)? The ‘i’ means that the ‘c’ has a ‘tch’ sound (or the ‘g’ has a ‘j’ sound) and now you need to double it: gutch-chi, for-maj-jo. Easy, right? Now that you know all this, you will never misspell cappuccino.

6. ‘S’ and ‘z’

A single ‘s’ is pronounced like the English ‘z’, as we already saw in lasagne. A double ‘s’ is pronounced like in the English word ‘hiss’ – massimo (meaning greatest; emphasis on the first syllable). The letter ‘z’ is pronounced like ‘ts’ – for example, gorgonzola (gor-gon-tso-la, a type of cheese). It is difficult to double the sound for a double ‘z’, so it sounds pretty much the same as a single – for example, pizza (pit-sa, and you know what that word means!) and mozzarella (mo-tsa-rel-la, a kind of cheese).

How you pronounce ‘sc’ depends on whether the ‘c’ is hard or soft. If the ‘c’ is soft, ‘sc’ is pronounced like ‘sh’. So you get pesce, meaning fish (pronounced pe-she) and Gramsci (surname, pronounced gram-shi). If it’s a hard ‘c’, then ‘sc’ is pronounced like ‘sk’: scherzo (joke) is pronounced sker-tso.

Now you are ready to tackle any Italian name, map, or menu. Have fun!

Word Nerd: 11 essential words we have Shakespeare to thank for

12 Jun

Why was Shakespeare one of the best writers in English? He had the best stories, characters and words. How? Stories he improvised, characters he invented, and words he borrowed.

Now, before belligerent bardolaters barge in, we’d like to say that yes, the Bard’s genius was just that – genius. And far be it from us to dismiss it or explain it away. Shakespeare was Shakespeare, and there are a 1000 reasons which make him the literary legend that he is.

But, one of the important ways in which Shakespeare enriched language was by inventing words. According to one source, the number is close to 1700. Of course, people argue that the words written by the Bard were probably in oral circulation earlier. However, he still deserves credit the first to write them, and down record them for posterity.

And so, we bring you a list of 11 words we use every day that are the Bard’s legacy.

1. Addiction: Othello

If not for the Bard & his penchant for coming up with new words, how would we define the way we feel about chocolate, TV series, and boybands?

2. Amazement: Pericles

Although the suffix ‘-ment’ has been replaced by ‘-balls’ in teenage jargon, the word remains important. To be fair, it originated in Middle English, but Shakespeare was the first to use it in this form.

3. Dauntless: Henry VI – Part 3

To daunt comes from the Middle English ‘to tame’. Henry VI advises Queen Margaret to not be tamed by misfortune, but to be dauntless and triumph over adversity. Words to live by, yes?

4. Eyeball: The Tempest

One of the techniques which Shakespeare perfected was using nouns as verbs. This is what gives the word’s modern usage its flavour, “Did you see the way she eyeballed his watch?”

5. Ladybird: Romeo & Juliet

While we aren’t overtly fond of the insect kingdom, we do love ladybirds. Something about them reminds us of summer picnics and happy times. There is an interesting explanation for the origin of that word which you can find here.

6. Leapfrog: Henry V

Not sure if the you have ever played leapfrog – it requires vaulting with parted legs over people who are bending down. (If it’s any fun, let us know) Again, a noun which is mostly used as a verb in the modern age. Everything leapfrogs these days – technology, relationships, and obviously, business executives.

7. Mortifying: Much Ado About Nothing

The word has Late Middle English roots, which mean repression. Shakespeare used this word both in Much Ado About Nothing & The Merchant of Venice. In the latter play, one of the characters says he would rather die of passion than of repression.

Today, of course, the word is commonly used to indicate extreme embarrassment. (That’s why it’s our favourite!)

8. Ode: Love’s Labour Lost

This word traveled from Greek to Latin to French before it was embraced by English, thanks to Shakespeare. The meaning of the word has remained the same – a lyric poem meant to praise.

9. Silliness: Othello

You would be surprised to know that, in Old English, to be silly meant to be happy or innocent. We guess the same school of thought inspired the adage, “Ignorance is bliss.” In Middle English, the word came to mean pitiable & weak. By Shakespeare’s time, it meant the same as it does today. Hence, Roderigo’s lament, “It is silliness to live, when to live is torment..”

10. Vulnerable: Macbeth

Shakespeare adopted the word from Latin. Again, the meaning has stayed constant, though the context has evolved ever so much. We doubt that in the 16^th century, being vulnerable was applauded as a way to connect with the world. But they didn’t have our new-age mumbo-jumbo then.

11. Zany: Love’s Labour Lost

Don’t you love the word? We do.

It also has the most interesting of etymologies, so stay with us. Italian clowns, when they played servants, were commonly called Giovanni. The name travelled to France and became zani, which was then adopted into English as zany.
It’s not an insult though. The word means something unconventional, out-of the-ordinary, eccentric. All good things to be.

Are there any important words we’ve missed? Or interesting word origin stories that you would like to share? Email us or leave a comment below.
Read other Word Nerd articles here.

Word Nerd: Are Rules Only for Fools?
Word Nerd: 5 made-up words that are now part of the English language
Word Nerd: A Good Vocabulary Makes You Smarter

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Word Nerd: How to write an email to your professor

5 Jun

Thanks in part to films such as The Absent-Minded Professor (a Disney classic from 1961), the 1963 film The Nutty Professor (remade in 1996 starring Eddie Murphy, and as an animated version in 2008), and the 1989 film Dead Poets Society starring Robin Williams, the eccentric professor has become something of a stereotype. The reality, of course, is that some professors are more eccentric than others, and all of them are busy people with lots of students and responsibilities.

In high school in many countries, the relationship between student and teacher is formal and scripted. You know what you can say to your teacher, and what’s off limits. In many countries, you’re not encouraged to question what the professor says. However, if you enter college or a university in countries such as the US, things can seem disorienting at first. You are expected to raise questions in class. Many professors are happy when you seek them out in or outside class, for clarifications, to discuss an idea or first draft, or to share your thoughts on a class topic. Some professors may encourage you to address them by their first name, or bring candy or pizza for the class. None of this changes the fact that they are your professors, and not your buddies.

So when you send them email, how can you ensure that you are not being informal to the point of being borderline disrespectful or annoying? Here are a few tips.

Read the syllabus

At the beginning of the term, your professor may give you a syllabus. If you lose the hard copy (but don’t lose it!), you can probably still find it on the web. It is full of information about the course – office hours, course materials, weekly readings, exam schedule, how you will be assessed, and information on plagiarism rules, disability access, and other important concerns. Before you email a professor, check whether the information you’re seeking is in the syllabus.

Don’t start your email with ‘Hey, prof!’

Yes, this actually happens. ‘Hey’ or ‘whassup’ are appropriate greetings when you run into your roommates or classmates in the dining commons or gym. Not so much when you’re writing to your professor. The safest is “Dear Professor Einstein” or “Dear Dr. Einstein” or, if you have permission, “Dear Albert”.

Use the professor’s first name only if you have permission

Just because Professor Einstein said you may call him “Albert”, that does not mean this is the general practice at the university. Nor are you at liberty to shorten “Albert” to “Al”. Use the first name only if the professor clearly said you may do so, and pronounce it as they did. Do not take the liberty of changing “Magdalena” to “Maggie”, or “Siddharth” to “Sid”, unless that’s what the professor asks you to call her or him. And any time you’re in doubt, stick to “Professor [Last Name]”.

Use the subject line

Professors are busy people. Many have more than 100 students a semester, and other responsibilities besides teaching. They deal with a large volume of email. Make life a little easier for your professor by putting some thought into the subject line to say exactly what your email is about – for example, “Request for appointment”, “First draft of History 201 term paper”, “Horticulture 101 exam schedule conflict”.

Indicate how the professor knows you

Unless you are absolutely sure the professor knows exactly who you are, it’s best to say something like “I am in your Horticulture 101 class which meets on Tuesdays and Thursdays”, or “I took your Finance 411 class last semester”. Professors have hundreds of students, so be nice and help them out a little.

Be precise

It saves the professor’s time, and your time too. For example, rather than saying “I wanted to find out more about next week’s reading”, ask exactly what you need to know – which readings are optional, a particular assigned reading is unavailable, etc.

Focus

There’s no need for robotic precision – opening pleasantries are OK (for example, “I hope you are enjoying the beautiful weather today” or “I watched ‘Dead Poets Society’ after our discussion last week and really enjoyed it”). But don’t prattle. Remember, your professors have dozens of students at various levels, class preparation for multiple courses, research and writing of their own, perhaps administrative responsibilities on faculty committees, books and articles to review, assignments to grade, and of course a life outside of work. So be considerate of their busy schedule and keep your email as short as possible.

Give the professor enough time to respond

Don’t email a professor hours before your paper is due, asking for an extension on the deadline or comments on a draft. Don’t ask for letters of recommendation that are due in two or three days either – professors put serious thought into each letter. Remember that poor planning on your part is not an emergency on their part.

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By Uma Asher

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Categories Academics, Student, Teacher
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Word Nerd: 3 steps to writing a good paragraph

29 May

We’ve talked about how the secret to writing a respectable piece of prose is a good sentence. Today, we take another building block of quality prose – the humble paragraph.

We all feel the pain of trying to write a good paragraph.

As with all great writing, paragraphs are shaped by a writer’s instinct. That said, paying attention to the paragraph, and how it works, can improve your writing significantly. Francine Prose, author of the New York Times bestseller – Reading Like a Writer, says, ‘[A]s with sentences, merely thinking about “the paragraph” puts us ahead of the game, just as being conscious of the sentence as an entity worthy of our attention represents a major step in the right direction.’

To write a good paragraph, we must develop both a logical mind and a good eye. Why? One, it is the shape of our argument. To impress, your argument must be coherent, adequately developed, and shaped as an organic whole. Stylistically, paragraphs carry this responsibility. Each paragraph must clearly communicate an idea, develop it, and link it to what comes next.
Two, paragraphs are the shape of your thought on the screen or the page. If your thought is long and rambling, you might end up with large chunks of text. This can look dull. And your reader’s eye will skip many lines.
On the other hand, if you jump from one idea to the next like a drunk young monkey on a tree – the result is likely to be many small paragraphs. This too can be distracting for a reader.

Of course, there are exceptions. But, in academic writing, it is good to keep the above in mind. As are the 3 tips we share below which can help shape your paragraphs.

Choose the topic
As with the sentence, it helps to decide what you want to say.
For example, if you are writing a sketch of Madeline Bassett, a character from P.G. Wodehouse, you could have a paragraph on the topic of her daftness. Your next step is to craft the topic sentence. This is the first sentence in your paragraph and it serves as an introduction. For example, “Everyone knows that Madeline Bassett, daughter of the ill-tempered magistrate Sir Watkyn Bassett, is a daft girl.”
Develop the idea
Once you have your topic sentence, you need the controlling idea. The controlling idea in the topic sentence above is “everyone knows”. So, the paragraph can elaborate on the perspective of other characters and critics.
To develop the idea, you must give information. Why is Madeline daft? Is it because she thinks that stars are God’s daisy chain? Or because, to her, every new star on the Milky Way is a fairy’s tear? Possibly both.
Remember not to choke or clutter a paragraph with excessive information.
Connect
Once you have fleshed out an idea, it is time to articulate the next one, in the next paragraph.
It is important that your paragraphs are not islands on a sea but steps on a ladder. Therefore, each paragraph must connect to the one that came before, and the one that will come after. The final sentence of a paragraph is your bridge to the next one.
“What stands out about Madeline is not just her daftness but her impossible idealism.” Now you can continue writing your sketch of the Bassett.

To end, always revise. Do not miss the forest for the tree. Your paragraphs are part of a larger structure. And remember, with writing, as with all art, practice makes perfect.

Are there any tips on writing you would like to share with us? Email us or leave a comment below.

Word Nerd: 5 types of people with a big, black cloud over their head

22 May

Mondays – that manmade scourge – are the favorite day of no sane person. People who love Mondays usually fall somewhere between ‘annoyingly enthusiastic’ and ‘mentally disturbed’. The only reasonable response to Mondays is an ill-tempered grunt. So, without further ado, here are a few ways to describe most people on Mondays (unfortunately, some people are like this on other days also).

1. Grouch

This word, referring to a habitually grumpy person, dates back to the late 19th century. It comes from the Old French grouchier, which means to grumble or murmur. Interestingly, ‘grudge’ – a feeling of ill will or resentment towards someone – comes from the same root.

2. Grump

This word is much older than ‘grouch’. It dates back to the early 18th century, when ‘to grump’ was to utter inarticulate sounds expressing displeasure. A grump can refer to a grumpy person, or to a fit of sulking. Also used as a verb.

3. Grinch

This describes someone who is a spoilsport or killjoy. It comes from the character in the 1957 children’s classic, How The Grinch Stole Christmas, written by the amazing Dr. Seuss.

4. Crank

Engineers know a crank as part of an axle. This meaning comes from the Old English cranc, which refers to a weaver’s implement. But even the non-engineers among us know the North American meaning of crank – a bad-tempered person.

5. Curmudgeon

This word goes way back to the 16th century. Back then, it referred to someone who was grasping or greedy. Today, it just means a bad-tempered individual, especially an elderly person. The ‘cur’ in curmudgeon entered English three centuries prior, from other Germanic languages where it referred to snarling or growling.

Got any synonyms to add to our list? Leave a comment below!

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By: Uma Asher

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Categories Extracurricular, Knowledge, Student, Teacher
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