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You know when to call someone a tattletale or a copycat. You also know when to brand someone a turncoat or a nerd, a babbler or a blueblood. But these are basics. In today’s Word Nerd, we bring you 9 words which are great for describing people in ways you never thought of before. Enjoy.

1) Apple-knocker: An informal word used mostly in the US to describe ignorant and/or unsophisticated persons. It also means apple picker, or baseball player (especially a batter). In other words, someone who does physical work with no sophistication. Class-prejudice much?

2) Blatherskite: A person who talks at length without making sense. That’s the President of a certain country to you.

3) Deipnosophist: You know that person who is able to fork spaghetti while holding a glass of wine and talking sense about world affairs at the same time? If yes, label him or her a deipnosophist. That’s a person skilled in the art of dining and dinner-table conversation. Cheers.

4) Mouse potato: A cousin of the couch-potato. This one likes to spend their leisure time around computers. Don’t tell us you didn’t think of a mouse carved from a potato too at first.

5) Opsimath: A person who begins to study late in life. It is a Greek-origin word which, ironically, was adopted into English quite late as well – the 19^th century.

6) Peterman: Sounds like a respectable surname but means a thief who breaks and robs safes. It originated in the 19^th century when peter was slang for safe. “That safe would take quite the peterman to blow it!”

7) Possident: This word seems like a cross between Pepsodent and possum but has nothing to do with either toothpaste or mammal. Possident is a possessor i.e; a person who owns something.

8) Screenager: This word and mouse-potato are an ode to our obsession with technology and the total sway it holds over our lives. The word describes a person with an aptitude for computers and the internet. Not all screenagers are teenagers, in case you were wondering.

9) Wowser: You’d be surprised but wowser isn’t used for an Angelina Jolie or an Albert Einstein. Quite the opposite. This is NZ/Australian slang for a puritanical or censorious person, especially a person who frowns on alcohol. In other words, the one who gets dropped off most guest lists.

Are there any other curious words that you would like to share? Email us or leave a comment below.

Read other Word Nerds here.

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A good sentence is key to writing a respectable piece of prose – whether it’s a letter, an essay, or a novel. We can entertain ambitions about writing epic novels, or A-grade essays, but, without a good hold on this building block, our ambitions are likely to remain pipe dreams.

In this Word Nerd, we bring you 4 secrets to writing a good sentence. Remember these are not fixed rules but guidelines for developing your skill.

1. Know What You Want to Say

Sounds deceptively simple but, in the back of our minds, many of us think of writing as inspired. We feel that it’s like sitting in a boat on a stormy sea, at the mercy of the winds & waves, with little under our control.

But, for the most part, writing is like being on a hitchhiking trail. We need to know where to start, stop, and fix our milestones. And while we can expect surprises or challenges on the way, it takes good sense and preparedness to get us through.

Make writing a conscious effort. Get all your thoughts on paper (or the computer). Make diagrams, lists, and drafts. Once you know what you want to say, you will find the confidence and skill to say it.

2. Avoid Passive Voice

We can’t let this pass. Think of a sentence written in passive voice as a python with the reader as its victim. A coiling, constriction, and then death by asphyxiation.

Slow and boring.

Active voice is fundamental to good writing. And as a rule, it works for most of us.

“I threw the ball. Did Ann get hurt?” versus “The ball was thrown by me. Was Ann hurt by it?” (If Ann was, we suspect she might get medical attention in the time it took to frame that second sentence).

3. Make Every Word Count

Economy is a good rule of thumb when it comes to writing. How can we ensure clear and concise sentences?
Avoid redundancies (‘12 midnight’, ‘revert back’, ‘summarize briefly’). Avoid puffery, which includes hedge words (‘I think’, ‘I believe’ and ‘I feel’), filler words (‘actually’, ‘basically’, ‘naturally’), and intensifiers (‘very’, ‘extremely’, ‘quite’).

For example, “Rose is a beautiful girl” versus “I really think Rose is quite a beautiful girl”.
Read more in our Word Nerd here.

4. God is in the details

As a concept, the sentence offers limited space. So, be concrete. Details sharpen sentences. Use exact words, images and figures. “No ideas but in things” is not a maxim limited to poetry.

Another tip is to start and end a sentence with the words you want to emphasize. For example, “Even though the winters are long and cold, I love living in Michigan.” Or, “Maria had studied hard, so she scored an A.”

The faculty for paying close attention to detail comes only with practice.

Bonus tip: revise and rewrite. Whether it a sentence, a paragraph, a chapter or an entire book – we cannot make do without revision.

You would be surprised to know how many great writers struggle over early drafts of their writing. So, don’t be embarrassed if your first few constructions read poorly. Also, remember Robert Graves once said, “There is no such thing as good writing. Only good rewriting.”

Moral of the story: don’t be afraid to write and write until you get it right.

Are there any fundamental rules of good writing you would like to share with us?
Email us or leave a comment below.

Read more of Word Nerd here.

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For some reason, some people think that the harder something is to read, the smarter it must be. But a long word or a complex sentence is not necessarily more effective than a short word or a simple sentence. Indeed, the opposite is often true.  We have discussed before why verbosity is a terrible way to communicate. And now we have a real-life example of how terrible it can get.

Recently, the Supreme Court of India sent back a judgement by the High Court of Himachal Pradesh, because it was impossible to understand. The case was an 18-year-old dispute between a landlord and  tenant. The landlord went to the Supreme Court after the High Court barred him from evicting the tenant who was allegedly not paying rent. The landlord’s lawyer called the judgement “convoluted”, and the tenant’s lawyer joked that she would have to hire an English professor understand it.

Judge for yourself – some samples are below:

• [The] tenant in the demised premises stands aggrieved by the pronouncement made by the learned Executing Court upon his objections constituted therebefore… wherewithin the apposite unfoldments qua his resistance to the execution of the decree stood discountenanced by the learned Executing Court.
• However, the learned counsel…cannot derive the fullest succour from the aforesaid acquiescence… given its sinew suffering partial dissipation from an imminent display occurring in the impugned pronouncement hereat wherewithin unravelments are held qua the rendition recorded by the learned Rent Controller…

So many words… so little meaning!

It’s funny… or is it? After giving it time, two Supreme Court justices could come up with no judgement. Both parties in the dispute, as well as their lawyers, wasted time preparing for the hearing. A media report quoted the landlord’s lawyer as saying, “We normally prepare an appeal in two days’ time. However, in this case I took more than a week.” Someone somewhere spent time typing up words that nobody can understand.

If we could add up all the work hours used up each year to produce and understand such incomprehensible writing, what would be the cost to the country? And what about justice delayed? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

Read more Word Nerd posts here!

Life is awesome, right? So is pizza, The Walking Dead, and your favourite pair of Converse shoes. The word gets tired and loses its glow with overuse. Ask Dean Winchester.

So, for this Word Nerd, we came up with 9 lesser-known alternatives to awesome that you can sprinkle liberally on your conversations. We hope that the rest of your week will live up to the word and its variations.

1. Ace

You probably know this one, as do the Australians and the British. To ace is to excel – this could be in sports or in exams. Ace can be used as a verb (he aced his maths exam) and a noun (she is a tennis ace).

2. Budgeree

This one is from Australia. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, it dates back to the 18^th century. The word is a derivative of the Aboriginal ‘bujiri’. See that GIF above? Budgeree isn’t it!

3. Bonzer/ Bonza

Sounds like bonkers but means brilliant. The word is probably an Australian/Kiwi twist on ‘bonanza’. Bonzer is probably how we’d describe being chased round a bush by a roo.

4. Bad

Unbelievable, isn’t it? How the opposite of a word can share its meaning. We wonder if Michael Jackson has something to do with it. Probably. This is in the same category as “sick”.

5. Bodacious

The word goes back to the 19^th century but gained currency in the US in the 1990s after the release of Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989). While the word does mean awesome – it leans more towards complimenting someone on their attractiveness. In that sense, your crush is more likely to be bodacious than an essay is!

6. Bee’s Knees

Who would’ve thought that an insect’s joints could mean excellence.  Or, the expression, the Cat’s Pyjamas (we’re sure if cats wore pyjamas, they would be of the finest quality). This is quirky British slang for something top-notch. There are coarser alternatives, but those you can find elsewhere.

7. Blinding

Again, this one is British. When something is so brilliant, you lose your optical faculties – that’s blinding. Remember what Obelix said about the Brits?

8. Gradely

Used in the north of England, i.e; areas like Durham, Yorkshire, and Manchester, to mean fine, decent, and respectable. Also, awesome. This word hasn’t become widely used.  If you spouted the word in London or South of England, you might not be understood. But don’t let that stop you from expanding everyone’s vocabulary.

9. Spiffy

Used in both Australia and the US with slightly different connotations. In Australia, it just means great or excellent, but in the US, it’s a compliment for being smartly dressed. In both cases, we think it applies to Tom Hiddleston.

Do you have alternatives to the word awesome that you’re particularly fond of? It would be bonzer if you shared!
Email us or leave a comment below.

Read previous Word Nerd blogs here.

The UK has bizarre place names. We’re not just talking about the tiny Welsh town with a name 58 characters long – Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, or Pity Me – a village in Durham County. Between these two places – the first of which we doubt you’ll ever wrap your tongue around, and the second you will never get wrong, are a host of British villages, towns and cities, which fall in the purgatory of pronunciation. Many places in the UK have names that are an impossible mystery when it comes to pronunciation. What’s especially ironic is that when you learn of these names, they don’t seem challenging. And then one day you discover you’ve been getting them wrong all along.

That’s why, in today’s Word Nerd, we’re listing 8 of the most commonly mispronounced place names in the UK.

1. Magdalen College

There’s a Magdalen in Oxford and a Magdalene in Cambridge. In terms of spelling, it is only the final ‘e’ which distinguishes the sister colleges. It would be fair to pronounce the names as “Mag – da – len”. The correct pronunciation, however, is ‘Maud – lin’. That’s because 15^th century English speakers pronounced Magdalene without the g – as Maudelayne. Both colleges have preserved the old pronunciation.

2. Mousehole, Cornwall

There are few English speakers who would get either ‘Mouse-‘ or ‘-hole’, wrong. Yet, put together, the words are pronounced ‘Mow-zel.’ Apparently, the village gets its name from a huge cave a short distance away. And the Cornish accent determines the pronunciation.

3. Bicester, Oxfordshire

The UK has many ‘-cesters’. We can get a short glimpse into British history with this one. The Latin for fort, ‘-castra’, became the Anglo-Saxon ‘-ceaster’ for town or city, which mutated into ‘-chester’, ‘-caster’, and ‘-cester’. The ‘-ces’ sound in English place names is typically tricky. While Cirencester is pronounced as it is written, not so Gloucester or Bicester. Here the ‘-ces’ is silent. So, Bicester is pronounced ‘Bis-ter’.

4. Godmanchester, Cambridge

No one knows, and believe us we asked, why this place is pronounced ‘Gum-ster’. Tell us if you find out.

5. Worcestershire, England

This is the county where the famous sauce comes from. Like the sauce, the place isn’t pronounced ‘Wor-ces-ter’ but ‘Woos-ter’. And the ‘-shire’ is not ‘-shy-er’ but ‘sher’.

6. Marylebone, London

If you’ve played Monopoly, you know this place. It is one of London’s most affluent areas. But do you know how to pronounce it? Few people do.

The correct pronunciation is ‘Marry-le-bon’. But ‘Mar-lee-bone’ is also acceptable.

How did it come to that? In the 13th century, when the language of the aristocracy was French, St-Mary-by-the-Tyburn would have been St-Mary-a-le-Bourne. In the the present-day, it is ‘Marylebone’.

7. Cholmondeley, Cheshire

This polysyllabic wonder is pronounced ‘Chum-lee’. Didn’t Obelix say the Britons were crazy? Apart from phonetic laziness, the interwebs offer no plausible explanation for this freaky pronunciation.

8. Warwickshire, England

We would be remiss to not mention a ‘-wick’. This well-known English county (and its eponymous university) is pronounced ‘War-rick’. The ‘-w’ in many ‘-wick’ places is silent, for example, Norwich, Chiswick, and Greenwich. But not in Ipswich.

These Britons ARE crazy!

Read other Word Nerds here. Any other British places which have weird names or pronunciations? Email us or leave a comment below.

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Business news reports sometimes refer to “manufacturing units” when they mean “factories”. One college library had a sign above its photocopier that read “Reprographic Unit”. We often use two or more long words when a short one would be enough. This sort of verbosity – sometimes the result of a shaky vocabulary, and at other times bureaucratic tradition – is quite common in India. People in the UK or US are less likely to call a factory a manufacturing unit, and probably wouldn’t understand “reprographic unit”.

It is not a good idea to write verbosely because of your personal taste or cultural influence. Concise writing has clear benefits, regardless of where you or your readers are. Indeed, if your reader is from a different part of the world than you – as when you write a personal essay for a college application to study abroad – it is especially important.

Being concise forces you to choose your words carefully, and thus makes your writing clearer and more focused. As a bonus, over time, you develop the habit of thinking more precisely.

Concise writing makes for more efficient and compelling communication. Readers understand you faster. If your writing requires less effort to read, you are less likely to lose your reader’s interest half-way.

Here are some examples of how you can trim your writing. In the table below, the column on the left quotes actual professionally written reports. On the right are alternative ways to say the same thing.

The column on the right has 32% fewer words. So if you were writing a 2,000-word essay, you would free up 640 words by writing concisely. This would let you add information or examples to strengthen your argument, making your essay more powerful.

Here are some tips for lean writing:

1. Edit yourself. Read what you have written, and remove unnecessary words. Even the best writers in the world benefit from editing.

2. Use the active voice where possible. It’s quicker to say “The professor gave the class a test” than “A test was given to the class by the professor”.

3. Use short words when possible, and avoid using archaic or obscure words. For example, try saying “suspend” instead of “rusticate”, “use” rather than “utilize”, “and” instead of “as well as”.

4. Work on your vocabulary. A good vocabulary will help you be concise without compromising on nuance and precision. Improving your vocabulary should be an ongoing project, regardless of your language skills. Read literary fiction, and look up words when you’re unsure what they mean.

5. Keep lists short. If you need to list examples, be illustrative rather than expansive. An exhaustive list is not always necessary.

So you can train yourself to write in a focused, clear, persuasive, and compelling manner. Don’t wait until you write the first draft of your personal essay – start now!

Check out more Word Nerd posts here!

By Uma Asher

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Recently, we argued that poems can be as funny as they can be serious. In this Word Nerd, we’re making the same case for insults. Add enough wit to insults and they become glorious – masterpieces which are likely to offend and impress in equal measure.

And if you’re finding it hard to think of a cutting comeback in the heat of the moment, don’t worry. We bring you carefully crafted insults from men of letters, which will serve you well on most occasions.

Cheers!

1. “If your brains were dynamite there wouldn’t be enough to blow your hat off.”

Kurt Vonnegut, Timequake

Next time you want to call someone stupid? Tell them how little matter their skulls hold. In Kurt Vonnegut’s words. Burn.

2. “I never saw anybody take so long to dress, and with such little result.”

Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest

Wilde is widely feted as the Sultan of Sass. Done with someone’s tardiness? Issue the ultimate diss.

3. “I misjudged you… You’re not a moron. You’re only a case of arrested development.”

Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises

Looking for a sophisticated way of venting your frustration at someone being slow? Let Hemingway show you how. The first sentence fools, the second slams.

4. “You see, but you do not observe.”

Arthur Conan Doyle, A Scandal in Bohemia

Are you a fan of BBC Sherlock starring Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman? If yes, Cumberbatch’s delivery must be etched in your memory. If no, it will be now.

5. “Stop worrying about growing old. And think about growing up.”

Philip Roth, The Dying Animal

Not sure if it happened to you but we grew up thinking that age meant maturity. And then one day, realized it didn’t necessary. Thanks, biological adults, for showing us.

6. “I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of new play; bring a friend. If you have one.”

George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

Insults are incomplete without rejoinders. Here is a famous example from two intellectual giants who despised each other – Shaw and Churchill.

7. “Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second . . . if there is one.”

Winston Churchill to George Bernard Shaw.

Are there any particular insults which are your favourite? Email us or leave a comment below.

Every party has a crashing bore who will corner you and launch into a labyrinthine story. Every seminar has that one gasbag in the audience who will share a personal opinion disguised as a never-ending question. Every family gathering has that dreaded relative with a chronic case of verbal diarrhea. Verbosity is a common hazard, and it is impossible to completely avoid it. Somewhat ironically, the English language has a hoard of synonyms for it. Here are a few of the less commonly used ones.

1. Argle-bargle

Similar to argy-bargy, argie-bargie, argey-bargey, and argue-bargue. The dictionary defines this as a disputatious argument or a bandying of words. It’s common to see people engaging in argle-bargle in any Indian market.

2. Balderdash

This is the term for a senseless jumble of words, nonsense, or trash, whether written or spoken. Oddly, in the past it also meant a jumbled mixture of liquors, such as of milk and beer, or beer and wine. That usage is now obsolete, but some people still talk like they’ve been drinking balderdash.

3. Blether

Sometimes spelled ‘blather’. The dictionary defines this as voluble talk that makes no sense. In his poem “The Vision”, written in 1786, the Scottish poet Robert Burns remarked that he had wasted his “youthful prime” doing nothing but “stringing blethers up in rhyme for fools to sing”.

4. Drivel

This refers to idiotic utterances or silly nonsense. Interestingly, it once referred also to drooling, or – to use the Oxford English Dictionary’s more clinical description – “spittle flowing from the mouth”.

5. Gibberish

This refers to unintelligible speech that belongs to no known language. It is sometimes applied to ungrammatical language and pretentious verbiage. The verb form refers to someone speaking rapidly and nonsensically. It can also refer to the chattering of an ape.

6. Gobbledygook

This usually refers to jargon – the unofficial language of many professionals, bureaucrats, and pretentious people. In one of the dialects, known as Legalese, sentences often begin with “whereas” and go on for several pages. Gobbledygook is known to be an effective cure for insomnia. Here’s a resource to create unlimited gobbledygook.

7. Hooey

This is American slang for nonsense. The British English equivalent is ‘bunk’. Politicians and TV pundits are often abundant sources of of hooey.

8. Rigmarole

The dictionary defines this as “a succession of incoherent statements; an unconnected or rambling discourse; a long-winded harangue of little meaning or importance”. In other words, it’s part of everyday life.

Someone’s blah-blahs giving you the blues? Cheer yourself up by reading more Word Nerd posts!

By: Uma Asher

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Is English a phonetic language? Yes. No. Maybe. If it was as phonetic a language as Hindi or Spanish, we would speak it just as we spell it. Instead, we have the silent k’s (knowledge, knight, kneel) and g’s (gnash, gnostic, gnome), the moody oe sound (shoes, does, goes), and the troublesome th (Thames, Thomas, thyme). And proper nouns, let’s not even get started with those!

In this Word Nerd, we’re not even veering into the treacherous territory that is accent. Or slang. Or how the language evolves and shape-shifts through history. We’re agreeing that English is a weird language. One that has frustrated many new learners and non-native speakers, who saw the gaping chasm between spelling and speaking, and fell headlong into it.

One of them, Gerard Nolst Trenité, penned a poem “In the Chaos”. The poem is a new learner’s rant on just how exasperating English pronunciation is! While Trenite catalogues many oddities, he saves the most perverse for the last stanza– the ough sounds.

Finally, which rhymes with enough—
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?

Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is:  GIVE IT UP!!!

We can hardly fault Trenite with feeling frustrated. The ough sound is, by far, the most variable in the language. It has at least six pronunciations in North American English and ten in British English. Trenite’s four lines have seven pronunciations of the ough sound (to rhyme with bracketed words): enough (ruff); though (toe); through (true), plough (bow); dough (doe); cough (coffin); hiccough (cup).

We feel your pain, weeping Van Der Beek

Non-native speakers are not the only ones who have felt like giving up. William Thomas Goodge, an English writer and journalist, wrote “Ough – A Phonetic Fantasy”. Listen to it here. The fun in the poem is that the words, if pronounced as they’re supposed to, completely betray the rhyme scheme!

English seems to have a bug when it comes to pronunciation. And it’s more than likely that you will embarrass yourself at one point or the other. There is an anecdote of an English academic who, at her retirement, spoke of things going “oar-y”. It was after some confusion that students understood she meant “a-wry”.

So, when you mispronounce something, remember not to be too hard on yourself. Also, try not to be too harsh with others when they do. You can be the pronunciation police, if you play the good cop!

Which words trip you up? Leave a comment below or email us.
Read more of Word Nerd here.

By Skendha Singh

Blue moons, green thumbs & red carpets – these colourful phrases are a staple of our vocabulary. So much so that we are almost unconscious of how quirky a take on reality they are! For instance, do Prince Charles & his royal mum really have blue blood in their veins?
Unless royals are octopuses in disguise, we have every reason to believe that their blood is red. So where do these phrases come from? And do they have any basis in reality?

In this edition of our weekly Word Nerd, we are looking at 8 quirky phrases which colour our language. Enjoy!

1. Blue moon: The figure of speech is commonly used in “once in a blue moon. . .” which indicates a rare occurrence. As rare as a second full moon in a calendar month, because that’s what a blue moon is!

2. Blue blood: The colour blue has a link to aristocracy and privilege. Royalty is blue-blooded while Oxford and Cambridge are known as blue-brick universities.

The term ‘blue-blood’ is said to have come from the Spanish ‘sangre azul’.

When Spain was ruled by Moors, the Castilian nobles refused to intermarry – thus retaining an extremely fair and translucent complexion, through which their veins were visible.

This idea became popular throughout Europe. And European royalty, with its abhorrence for tanning, came to be known as blue-blooded.

3. Bluestocking: The term was derogatory, and used for men and women who wore blue-wool worsted stockings, not the black silk numbers fashionable in 18^th century England.

Later, blue-stocking also meant individuals who attended literary salons. By time Queen Victorian came to rule, it meant women who had literary and intellectual pursuits. Such women were considered frumpy and unattractive.

4. Green thumb (US) or green fingers (UK): While we suggest you see a doctor if you have green extremities, the terms are a compliment for someone with a gift for gardening.

It is speculated that handling algae encrusted pots turned fingers and thumbs green, and this is how the term originated.

5. Purple prose: Here’s a great definition of purple prose by Jessica Page Morrell, “In purple prose, skin is always creamy, eyelashes are always glistening, heroes always brooding, and sunrises always magical. Purple prose also features an abundance of metaphors and figurative language, long sentences and abstractions.”

In other words, prose which is ornate and flowery to the point of silliness.

Why purple? Horace, one of the finest ancient poets, referred to “grand declarations” and “weighty openings” as “purple patches” in his Ars Poetica (The Art of Poetry).

6. Pink-slip: A metonym for being fired. Apparently in the US, musical shows were issued cancellation notices on pink slips. This was early in the 20^th The phrase has become well-entrenched in the language since then.

7. Blackmail: In the mid-16^th century, border dwellers in north England had to pay tribute in the form of goods or labour to Scottish raiders. This tribute staved off raids. And it was the origin of blackmail.

Any interesting phrases which are quirky, colourful and a part of your daily vocabulary? Leave a comment or email us.

Read other Word Nerd posts here.